magic carpet rides

I can show you the world
Shining, shimmering, splendid
Tell me, princess,
Now when did you last let your heart decide?

I can open your eyes
Take you wonder by wonder
Over sideways and under
On a magic carpet ride

Ah, fairy tales.
Once upon a time, I was a huge believer in fairy tale endings, in blissful idealism, in hopeful optimism. I was the princess in every story, I was the queen of the castle, and I genuinely, earnestly, unfailingly believed that my story would end happily-ever-after.

Perhaps that was foolish. I tumbled head-over-heels, blindly dove headfirst into unseen depths I thought I could navigate with my eyes tightly shut...and then, from what was supposed to be a dream coloured in a rosy haze of bliss, I found myself waking up in the darkest of nightmares.

Heartbreak is one thing. Shattered idealism is completely different. The fall from the pedestal of perfection is that much harder, the jagged shards of truth that remain are that much more fragmented. The process of rebuilding the heart alone is an uphill battle; relearning how to think and feel about love, to trust instinct again (rather than constant psycho-analysis and cynical over-examination) is a feat that seems insurmountable.

A frustrating process, to be sure, and one that has been at times inconceivable...but not impossible. I'm learning, slowly, to trust myself again, and to trust the words and actions of another. I had relegated unequivocal trust to a place of foolish ignorance. Now, it has become a daily ordeal to extricate my ability to believe in love without cynicism from the confines of fear. It's not easy. It's not pretty, a lot of the time. It's laborious, painstaking effort. This time, though, my eyes are open. They're wide open. And while I am sometimes tempted to squeeze them shut and hide, staying stagnant and scared, I am choosing to keep them open.

In the story of Aladdin, the unlikely street-rat-turned-hero-prince pulls up to Princess Jasmine's window on a flying magic carpet. Although frightened, cautious and inarguably skeptical, she decides to go with him, to take the risk. She is not jumping into something with her eyes closed. Instead, albeit tentatively, she is opening herself to new things - with a bird's eye view, no less! - and is willing to embrace possibility, to explore it, to encourage it to grow. Faced with the same incredible, unexpected opportunity, I am sincerely attempting to do the same.

A whole new world
A new fantastic point of view
No one to tell us 'no'
Or where to go
Or say we're only dreaming

A whole new world
A dazzling place I never knew
But when I'm way up here
It's crystal clear
That now I'm in a whole new world with you

Unbelievable sights
Indescribable feelings
Soaring, tumbling, free-wheeling
Through an endless diamond sky

A whole new world (Don't you dare close your eyes)
A hundred thousand things to see (Hold your breath it gets better)
I'm like a shooting star
I've come so far
I can't go back to where I used to be

A whole new world (Every turn a surprise)
With new horizons to pursue (Every moment red-letter)
I'll chase them everywhere
There's time to spare
Let me share this whole new world with you

A whole new world
That's where we'll be
A thrilling chase
A wondrous place
For you and me

A Whole New World,
from Aladdin